


i've been quiet for too long

by Chae_moon



Category: Shazam! (2019)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, M/M, only a tiny bit sad, really it's not that Sad, this is a 3+ fic bc im too lazy to do 5+
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-02
Updated: 2019-08-02
Packaged: 2020-07-29 15:49:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,136
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20084764
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chae_moon/pseuds/Chae_moon
Summary: Three times it's too quiet for Billy, and the one time it's not.





	i've been quiet for too long

**1.**

Billy sits at lunch alone. 

He finishes sipping his juice box, squeezing until there are dents in the cardboard.

He throws the rest of his lunch away and walks to the library.

It's mostly empty. Ms. Hendrick, the librarian, sits at her desk idly sipping from a mug, and a kid Billy recognizes from seventh-period algebra sits at one of the tables flipping through an old copy of Oliver Twist.

He nods at Ms. Hendrick then picks a table near the back of the library. He opens his backpack and pulls out a green folder with Freddy Freeman written across the top in bubble letters.

There's a small little bat symbol doodled in the corner and a tied game of tic tac toe Billy and Freddy had played last week.

He smiles. Then pulls out the homework Freddy missed yesterday.

It's only a couple of dumb worksheets, and Billy can forge handwriting easily by now, so Freddy's (surprisingly) neat handwriting isn't hard to replicate.

He decides to start with math. Scanning the worksheet, Billy realizes it's all stuff that Freddy could probably finish in seconds, but Billy decides to do it for him anyway.

Freddy's had a fever all week and is home in bed.

Billy would rather come home from school that night and watch Freddy sip chicken noodle soup while reading about Superman punching Lex Luthor for the millionth time than stress over missing assignments. So he grabs a sharpened pencil and starts.

Every now and then he has to remind himself to write everything in Freddy's small fine writing as opposed to Billy's natural messy lines. But surprisingly he's able to finish everything before the period ends.

It's odd to be finished so fast seeing as Freddy and Billy typically take hours to complete their homework. Their conversation steering from biology to the latest Super Villain back to biology and then around that time Freddy gets antsy and convinces Billy that flying around Philadelphia would be a great way to pass the time.

Normally Billy tries to put up a fight saying, "Come on, Freddy let's just finish this and go to bed."

But there's something about the set of Freddy's brown eyes and the way they light up whenever Billy agrees to his schemes that always ends with Billy rolling his eyes, yelling Shazam, and flying out the window with Freddy on his tail.

Billy doesn't really get it.

It's quiet without Freddy and Billy's never minded quiet.

Yet.

**2.**

When Billy gets home that night, Freddy is fast asleep.

"Should I wake Freddy up for Dinner?" Billy asks Rosa as he helps her set the table.

"No, I think it'd be good to let him rest," she says, setting down a bowl of pasta.

"Yeah you're probably right," Billy says glancing up to the stairs and silently hoping he'll spot Freddy yawning and coming down.

He doesn't.

**3.**

The next day at school is grilled cheese day at the cafeteria. Meaning it's Wednesday. Freddy loves, _ adores _ grilled cheese day but hates Wednesdays.

"It's an eternal paradox," Freddy would always say while slumping down in his chair.

Grilled Cheese day seems sort of lame without Freddy spewing gross cheese facts, so Billy flees to the library again.

Once again he finishes all of Freddy's homework with half the period left and nothing but the quiet to comfort him.

There was a time when that would have been enough for Billy. Hell, he would have cherished it. He'd rather have quiet than another social worker telling him, "They don't want to take you back, Billy. You need to think about your actions and options."

Billy can count all the crisp cold Decembers he has spent sitting alone on park benches after another search for his mom had gone nowhere.

Those were the nights where sometimes the silence became a little too heavy. Those nights even the chatter of strangers or the soft sounds of music floating from car radios dissipated. It was just Billy, the cold, and the quiet.

The period ends, and Billy goes to Biology. They are doing a week of class presentations, and it's Kelly Sharma's turn to present.

She goes up to the front of the class unfolding a colorful poster with "The Brain" written in red pen.

A week ago, the whole class had been assigned their body parts by their teacher Mr. Lee. Billy had gotten the heart, and Freddy had gotten lungs.

"Lungs? Are you kidding me? Lungs. That's so lame I wanted to get the brain," Freddy moaned, folding his arms on his desk and leaning his head down.

"Lungs aren't that bad. They help us breathe and stuff which is kind of nice," Billy commented.

"Lammmmeee," Freddy muttered.

Kelly Sharma's presentation isn't bad, but when she starts talking about memory, Billy starts drifting away.

A couple of weeks ago while he and Freddy were laying in their bunk beds, half-asleep Freddy had whispered: "did you know that the first thing you forget about someone is their voice?'

"Uh, no."

"Yeah, well it's because that stuff is stored in your sensory memory and it's hard to access unless heard again," Freddy explained.

"Huh?"

"Yeah. it's pretty weird the way our brains work."

Billy was going to joke about being glad because he couldn't wait to forget Mr. Kowalski's voice (their math teacher), when Freddy spoke again, this time even quieter than before.

"I can't remember anything about them. Not their voice, not their faces, nothing. I know it's dumb, but I thought that maybe after I got superpowers maybe all the memories I lost would come back too but."

There's the sound of a rough inhale.

"I'll never get them back. I have no memories of my parents. They're gone forever."

Billy jumped down from his bunk and sat on the edge of Freddy's.

Suddenly unsure of himself, he folded his arms across his chest, trying to figure out what to say. How to make it right.

Well, not make it right. There were no making things _right_, Billy knew that. But maybe make it _better_.

Freddy sat up, scooted closer, so they were sitting shoulder to shoulder than turned his head, looking at Billy with a sad gaze.

"I'd never forget your voice." That's what slipped out of Billy's mouth.

He felt his entire face turn cherry red.

"What?" Freddy's eyes widened. 

"⏤Because you talk so much!" Billy quickly amended, a bit loudly.

"How could I forget your voice when all you do is talk. I mean not that it's a bad thing of course but⏤"

Freddy cut him off with peels of laughter, knocking his shoulders into Billy's. 

Even thinking of the memory Billy's ears burn.

The eighth period of the day is English for Billy. In class today, they have silent reading time for the whole period but Billy's distracted.

More silence? He almost can't stand it.

The only sound is the turning of a page, and it reminds Billy of all the night's he spent at Philadelphia Library searching all public records for a Ms. Baston.

He used to think that when he finally found his mom, that that's when he'd let the noise in. That's when he'd laugh and listen and play music.

That's when his life would begin.

When he finally did knock on the right door. And the woman with dirty blonde hair and mournful blue eyes came out it was quieter than December, quieter than nights sleeping at the library, it was like all that existed was his mom and him.

And then the spell was broken.

His mom told him she had seen him, and she had left him with the police.

He had never stopped searching for her, he had thought it was his fault, and she had given up years ago.

Suddenly he could hear his heartbeat thumping through his ears, hear the man yelling from the inside of his mom's apartment.

He was right in a sense. Once he met his mom, he was able to hear the noise of her life. It just wasn't the life he wanted anymore.

**3+**

When Billy gets home that afternoon, Freddy is awake and thumbing through "Batman: The Long Halloween."

He perks up when Billy opens the door.

"Oh great, you're home. I’ve been reading this same edition for the past eight hours. Pretty sure my brain is mush." Freddy says setting the comic book aside and smiling up at Billy.

"Still have a fever?" Billy asks, setting his backpack down.

"Nope, I'm all cured."

"Thank god, school was so boring without you. I mean I had to sit through Mr. Kowalski drown on and on about linear expressions, and I seriously considered gouging my eyes out with a pencil."

"Gross," Freddy says, wrinkling his nose, then, "you missed me?"

"Well, of course. I mean, what did you expect?" Billy says, staring down at his black converse and scratching the back of his neck.

When Billy peaks back up to look at Freddy, his cheeks are slightly pink.

That evening Freddy somehow persuades Victor to make Tomato Soup and Grilled Cheese for dinner.

"There are no vegetables in this," Darla mourns while carrying her grilled cheese to the table.

"Um it's literally called _ tomato _ soup," Freddy says, over-enunciating tomato.

"You're like one of those people who say ketchup is a vegetable," Billy says, setting a bowl of soup on the table.

"Ketchup _ is _ a vegetable!" Freddy insists.

Rosa and Victor laugh.

They do all hands on deck, and everyone is eating when Freddy says, "Did you know scientists have successfully created cheese using human bacteria collected from toes and belly buttons."

Billy feels himself smile so wide it hurts. 

It's totally gross, but he missed _ that_.

"That's revolting! I'm trying to eat Freddy," Mary cries looking down at her sandwich as if it was in fact made of toes and belly buttons. 

Darla's eyes widen, and she slowly sets her sandwich down, "I think I'm going to be vegan from now on." 

Rosa smiles, nervously, "Freddy, that's very interesting, but why don't we only share appetizing food facts." 

Freddy shrugs, "my bad." 

"Why is Billy smiling like that it's creepy!" Eugene says while pointing at him. 

Everyone turns to look at Billy. He feels his face flush.

"Uh⏤"

"See! Billy appreciates my vast knowledge," Freddy says triumphantly. 

Pedro rolls his eyes muttering "I'm sure that's _ it _." 

That night while they're getting ready to go to bed Freddy's eyes widen.

"Shit."

"What?" Billy asks watching Freddy run an erratic hand through his hair.

"I haven't done any homework."

"Oh."

"I'm screwed. The teachers gave you all my assignments, right? Can you get them? I bet if I pull an all-nighter, I can finish," Freddy says while digging through their shared desk for a pencil.

Billy opens his backpack and pulls out Freddy's folder.

"Here," Billy says, handing it to Freddy.

"Thanks, you're a lifesaver," Freddy says, opening it up.

Freddy freezes when he sees the first worksheet.

"What?" he says frowning while glaring at it, his own familiar handwriting staring him in the face.

Billy stays quiet.

He flips through the whole folder frowning the entire time.

Freddy looks up "How did⏤" he takes in Billy's expression.

"Did you?" Freddy asks, pointing at the folder.

Billy nods.

It hadn't seemed like such a big deal when Billy was doing it, but with Freddy looking at him like that he wonders if it was.

"Why?"

Billy shrugs. Then clears his throat, "I just didn't want to make you do homework while you were sick."

"That's..." Freddy looks back down at the worksheets.

"You know my handwriting?" He says his eyes tracing Billy's forgeries.

"Yeah of course."

Freddy grabs the top worksheet and points to the little flying Superman doodled in the middle of the page. Then he grabs another one and points to the storm clouds with lighting reigning down on the completed algebra equations.

"This... I mean, how'd you even get all my little doodles." Freddy asks.

Billy swallows.

"You know that time, near the beginning where I was a dick about the whole superpower thing."

"Yeah sure," Freddy says frowning, not getting where Billy's going with this.

"Well, you said something back then," Billy fidgets.

There isn't really any going back he thinks looking into the brown of Freddy's eyes. He may be a superhero now, but that doesn't make being brave any easier.

But he wants to, he so desperately wants to be brave.

"You asked me if I even saw you."

Freddy flinches like the memory physically hurts.

"You said most people don't want to and that now I don't either."

Billy takes a deep breath then, "But you're wrong Freddy, you're⏤" 

Billy looks up meeting Freddy's gaze head-on, "You're all I see."

  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> i just saw the movie a couple of days ago and knew I had to write something. If you disagree with this pairing that's totally cool just pls don't leave mean comments. i hope you enjoyed reading this :))


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